Communication is very important for having a good relationship. Without it, your relationship simply won’t last. You have to be willing to work on talking to each other. That means also discussing the hard things, too, like your need for more in bed or your partner lack of affection towards you.

If you don’t talk about your problems, they just will pile up. And the more unexpressed issues you have suppressed the more likely that you won’t be able to move past those issues, and after a certain point, that’s when the relationship will crumble. I know that it takes two to have a conversation. And sometimes one person can make it really hard on the other to even express their concern. But I got you covered! Here are some communication techniques that can help you save your relationship. Casanova Style…

COMMUNICATION TECHNIQUES #1: DON’T BE ACCUSATORY

If you go into a discussion with this kind of attitude, it’ll quickly form into a fight. And when someone is arguing, they feel attacked. If you make your partner feel attacked every time you want to work something out, you’ll never get anywhere.

People who feel like they’re being blamed for something immediately get on the defensive. That means you won’t be able to talk anything through because they’ll close themselves off to protect themselves from being hurt. Stay calm and you’ll have a much better conversation.

COMMUNICATION TECHNIQUES #2: SHARE YOUR FEELINGS FIRST

If you really want your partner to pay attention, start the conversation with how you’re feeling. This is one of the most important communication techniques and is crucial because if you immediately begin with their faults, they’ll stop listening.

Nobody wants to hear about all they’re doing wrong. However, if you talk about how you’re upset, they’ll want to listen to why. They care about you. That means they care about your happiness and if you’re not happy, they’ll want to know why.

COMMUNICATION TECHNIQUES #3: MAKE TALKING A REGULAR THING

Just get into the habit of talking to each other. You really have to just do it. Every single day, sit down and talk about your day. Then discuss any issues you might have. It can seem weird at first, but you’ll get the hang of it.

You can even just mention how you’re a little bummed about the way they just blew you off when you asked a question. Even small things should be discussed and if you make this a regular part of your relationship, your partner will just open up automatically after a while.

COMMUNICATION TECHNIQUES #4: ASK QUESTIONS

If you have a significant other who just won’t open up to you on their own, you’ll need to utilize questions. Just ask a lot of them. You can simply start with asking about their day and go a little deeper.

Ask if they’re happy in your relationship. Talk about what they think about your sex life. It’s easier to get them to talk if they’re prompted first. Plus, by the time they figure out what you’re doing, they’ll have already dished a bunch of information you’ll find useful.

COMMUNICATION TECHNIQUES #5: KEEP A LIGHT TONE

You can have serious conversations about how you’re unhappy without a harsh tone. Remaining calm and even happy will help your odds of getting your partner to talk more.

When you’re in a good mood, they don’t sense anything serious, even if the topic gets there. You’re more likely to get an honest response out of them this way. Keep the tone light and you’ll have a lot more luck.

COMMUNICATION TECHNIQUES #6: OPEN UP

You have to be vulnerable to your partner so they can be vulnerable to you. Opening yourself up will help your partner see that it’s okay to do so. You grow a lot closer and bond deeper the more you open up to each other. Talk about your fears for your relationship or even things you’re scared of in general.

But keep things honest. Don’t lie just to get your partner to talk to you. If you just talk about how you’re feeling, about what you want and you’re being open and honest, they’ll feel the need to be the same.

COMMUNICATION TECHNIQUES #7: ASK IF THEY UNDERSTAND

If you really want to make sure that the communication is effective, then ask if they understand where you’re coming from. Oftentimes, your partner might not even get it but they’ll agree to it anyways at the moment.

If you ask if they understand, they’re more likely to give you an honest answer. They might say yes they do, or even no. If they tell you that they don’t that not only tells you that you have to be more specific when explaining stuff, it’ll allow you to take more time to make sure that they really get it.